Monday, November 23, 2020

My last post was two lockouts ago...I'm a bad person.

 


As you can see, I'm a complete asshole. Or, at least, the Brown Shirts at FB think I am.  Let's go thru a few of these, just so you can see that I'm truly a wonderful person, I'm just misunderstood.

But first, let me give you a  picture of what FB is for me.   When I was in college, my friends and I would very often hang around the cafeteria, eating, drinking coffee, and bullshitting.    On days when I didn't have classes I might spend most of the day there, studying and bullshitting as my mood allowed.  That's the way I view FB.  I have no life, so I spend most of my day in front of a computer, and much of that time is spent on FB.  I drink coffee and bullshit and argue politics and social issues and all of that, just like I did back in school.

There IS a big difference between then and now, however.  Back then we had all sorts of shit going on...War in Vietnam, the sexual revolution, girls were getting rid of their bras so their tits would swing free, the fight for civil rights for Negroes  was going hot and heavy, fuckin' hippies telling us to make love and all that...in short, we had no end of things to discuss and figure out, and that often involved us yelling at each other, pounding the table, and wondering how someone could be so stupid as to think this or think that.  Then we'd all go out for beer and pizza or some shit.  The point is there was nothing personal about any of it. We were just young folks talking over the issues of the day. There was no anger, no animosity, no hatred...we were just people bullshitting.

Today, however, you know the story. Everyone hates anyone who disagrees with them, and has to express that hatred with the highest degree of vitriol that one can manage.  Not me.  I don't play that way and never have. I might disagree with someone,  but that won't affect my friendship, I won't get angry, I won't scream, and I won't wish someone dead because we disagree about something, friend or not.   Big shock, I know.

That's what all social media is and has been for me, a place to talk about stuff;  that's what FB is and has been for me.  But, over the years, my friends list has narrowed, and the ones left don't really enter into social and political discussion with me, with one or two exceptions.  I mean, I post shit trying to lure them in, but I'm seldom successful.  (My wall, or whatever it's called, is visible to friends, but not the public.)  So I go hunting in the public news threads...and that's almost always a mistake.  I don't speak Political Correctness, don't share the current view that the very most baddest sin in the world is that someone is offended by something, and I speak standard (this is, non-woke) English.  With the fucking pussies that pass for adults these days, I'm always pissing someone off.  Even when I'm "trying to be good," I end up pissing people off.  And, eventually and inevitably, if those are different, some asshole reports me to the FB Brown Shirts...and off I go for a month.

If you look at this report card from FB, you'd think I was some sort of Nazi.  But I ain't.  I don't hate anyone. I don't harass anyone. I don't bully anyone.  For example, this latest "violation" for "harassment and bullying" is sexist bullshit.  In a thread about three dead people, I commented that one of the dead women looked like she had a mustache.  Judge for yourself.

Mind you, I didn't say she had a mustache, just that  it looked as though she might have.  Well, apparently you're not supposed to ask questions about people who croak from The COVID, judging from the shit people said to me.  So, this one woman bitched me out for having the gall to ask such a horrid question, and called me a "jerk."  I responded, in part, by calling her a "twat."   She reported me for having the effrontery to respond in kind... BOOM!  HARASSMENT!  BULLYING! THIRTY DAYS!!

(deep voice announcer)

Tune in again, tomorrow for continued pissing and moaning.  Our hero is too stoned to type any more, and he seems to be drinking, too.  He ain't drunk, but he's a'drankin'...





 








Monday, September 7, 2020

Facebook Dissection...when I get to it...

I ain't drunk, but I'm drinkin'...

...and I am stoned, so I don't know how this will turn out.  I mean, I made four typing mistakes in the first semi-sentence, alone.  That's too much work for some old retired asshole like me.  So, if that continues, I won't be at this long.  Mauybe wjat I shojuld do is just leave the mistakes in, like that, so you can show your kids what not to be when they grow up.  Nope, that offends my delicate sensibilities along with my ego, so that's out. 

This puts me in a bit of a quandary. I mean, when I'm stoned, I get very yammery, always good when you're blogging.  On the other hand, it annoys me to no end when I make typos and then have to correct them.  Oh, sure, sure, I could just keep typing, ignore the errors, and come back tomorrow or when I'm done with a particular post...but, truthfully (why would I lie?) I can't do that. The errors just keep eating at me...and I end up having to correct them.  I guess we'll see what happens.

It's not widely known, but I've never tried Indian food. 


I've wanted to for a long time.  There are lots of Indians and Pakistanis around here, so there are lots of their restaurants around, too, small to big, but, somehow, I've never gotten into one.  It's sad, really. I've never tasted a curry, for example.  You may be axing yourself right about now, "What does this have to do with Facebook, ace?"  "Nothing," would be my answer, were you to actually pose that question to me.  I told you I yammer when I'm stoned, and I've been smoking off and on...mostly on...since about five this afternoon, so damned near anything might come out of my fingers.

Speaking of fingers, lots of Indians eat with their fingers.  (They aren't the only ones who eat that way, lots of third world countries' people eat with their fingers, but we happen to be talking about Indian food at the moment.  Why don't you fucking pay attention? How would that be?)  Yeah...you can fuck that shit, as far as I'm concerned.  I don't like eating with my fingers.  Sammiches are usually ok, unless they are all juicy and leaky. Hamburgers and hot dogs, same thing.  If they don't drip and get sloppy, if all I have to do is hold onto the bun, we're good. Other than that, knife and fork, please.  Yes, yes, yes...Jesus... I DO eat chicken with a knife an fork. I often eat pizza that way, too, depending on how greazy and cheese-sloppy it is. If I can just grab  a dry piece of crust, that works for fingering. (Jesus, that's a fucked up sentence. Oh, well, you didn't pay to read this stupid shit. It doesn't have to be good.)

But, if anyone thinks I'm going to eat rice with a bunch or sloppy shit on it, or grab hunks of meat or veggies or ANYTHING with my fingers, they have another think  coming.  Fuck that.  Ain't gonna happen, not here, not in India (where I would dearly love to go.)  Not anywhere.



Oh, shit...I don't know how to get this left justified.  See? This is what happens when you do drugs...

Ok, I did figger it out.

Fly...




Sunday, September 6, 2020

Actually, I'm kinda glad I was forced off FB for a while...THIRTY DAYS, ASSHOLE!

 



...um...

Well, would you just look at the time!  Normally, this is the time I read and listen to music, posting what I'm listening to on FB, for some reason.  Why I do that I'm not sure.  (The posting, not the listening or reading.)  I began doing it some time ago, and though very few people ever listen to the crap, I've continued doing it because...well, because I'm very easily habituated. Once I begin doing something and it feels comfortable to me, I normally continue doing it until I don't want to any more or until I feel stupid about whatever it is.

What's my point?  It should be obvious to the most casual observer. I'm gonna build a cup of coffee, blast some blues thru my head, and read...and now and then pretend I'm on FB and bleat out some stupid shit.

For now, listen to this.  I'll be back...probably...that's a link right below this...CLICK!

You people DO like Nemeh, right?

This must be elder abuse...

 

Hello? HELLO?


Anyone out there?  I don't see how anyone could be, since I just invented this silly thing.  Still, I have to begin some kinda way, you know?  

Welp, I've been bounced from Facebook once again. I wish I had kept track of how many times I've been put in FB prison. I must hold some kind of record. Or maybe not. Maybe I'm just one of many assholes being culled from the FB herd.  Apparently, when a hugely fat Negress tells you you're an ugly racist, a "methed" (the bitch can't spell) and "I hope you die soon," apparently asking how much she weighs and if she has to be weighed on a grain scale is "bullying."  Maybe I shouldn't have added "Mooooo..." but it's too late to worry about that now.

I'll be back, I have to pee. I also have to urinate, so I'm going to do them both at the same time. That's efficiency right there...